Does anyone have anything that completely depresses you, even if it's not depressing? or is it just me? Examples of things that depress me even if they are not depressing...
1.) A Fine Frenzy. Beautiful fire haired woman who sings the most sweetly melancholy music. I LOVE IT, and when i listen to it, it makes me cry. 
I have some theories why a) it reminds me of Brock, but back in the "let's just be friends" days. and b) it reminds me that when i even mention something about me singing, my brother starts to laugh. Why can't i just have a perfectly mourning voice? why, crazy world? why?
2.) The end of the first Sisterhood of the Traveling pants movie. I just cry, and then cry some more, and then I want to call Snami, and then cry because she's probably busy and I'm sitting at home crying because why can't i be as fun (but not slutty) at Bridget, as creative at Tibby, as deep as Carmen, and as beautiful as Lena?
3.) December 26. I warned Brock i will be very depressed that day. I spend months planning and waiting for Christmas, and it's over in about 30 seconds, or so it feels.
4.) Going home.
Oh Washington, why are you a 12 hour drive? why can't i fly home every weekend to see my Mommy? Why do you remind me of when I was younger,
and remind me that I can't do it every again. Not ever...
5.) My wedding. It's an amazing moment, and i am truly grateful for it, but when I sit and stew about it, i get depressed.
My flowers were beautiful, but now they are dead, my dress was perfect, but not the perfect dress I thought it would be. Tyler wasn't' there, or Sam... it's just sad.
6.) My little brother, who is not so little anymore.
He's almost 18, and he will be 15 in my eyes forever.
7.) Rainy days. Now, some people think these are depressing, but i LOVE the rain, and i miss it so very much. When it rains, i get so sad, because I know it won't last.
I was not trying to convey that I am depressed, more that i am a very silly girl. Why do these things make my cry? It's so weird. But that's what makes me, me. :)
Friday, December 5, 2008
N/A to Christmas
Posted by Ashley Poulsen at 2:39 PM
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2 comments:
I completely understand where you are coming from here. My wedding depresses me too, but that is because I did not have any flowers and I really wanted a colored wedding dress, which I didnt get. Don't worry, you are not alone.
I understand the brother thing. When people ask how old my brother is, my first response is 12, then I remember he is 17. Sad.
But not my wedding. My wedding was AWESOME!!! Loved, loved, loved my dress and my flowers were fake so I still have them. Sorry.
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